Magazine Reflection Take Two

Overall, when you think about the big picture of your writing, what improved? How did it get better? Why?
When I think about the big picture of my writing and what improved I think about all the useless information that I cut out. There was so much useless information that I cut, an example would be when I talked about what internship was and how its done. I realized that it was useless considering that whoever is reading this magazine knows our school, and at least knows about what internship is. How it got better was through critiques with different people and getting information back on what was good what should be moved, added or even taken out.

Overall, when you think about the big picture of your writing, what still needs work? What do you think will help you improve? Why?
What I think could be improved is probably the writing structure. I think that the paragraphs could be moved around a little bit more so that I can make it flow better. I think what will help me improve is having someone who doesn’t even know about the magazine read it and just give me some feedback as to what they like and what they don’t like.

Specifically, show us something that improved and describe the path it took to get better. You can quote your article, your drafts, link to evidence, etc.
Something that I improved on was my writing structure. With the help of my teacher he told me what worked and what didn’t and he was more honest than my peers were which was what I needed. I also improved on removing the useless, unnecessary information. An example my first draft started like this

To graduate in the High Tech High Village you are required to have completed an internship. We do our internship in 11th grade. Internships are required because they give you a little preview of what its like in the real world doing something you possibly would like to pursue in the future. The internship coordinator sets you up with an internship, or you find your own. I was constantly told to get your own internship because you know yourself better than the internship coordinator and you know what you yourself like.

With a few critiques i realized that I needed to take this out. Other classmates were sure to refer to the process of internship. I didn't need to repeat it.

Describe something specific (or a few things!) that you learned about writing. Theres a lot of things that I learned about writing through this project

• Concerts not pancakes- Start the writing good and end it good. Don't be like pancakes having it start good and ending disgusting.
• Intro- I learned how to make my intro start interesting and to capture the reader. In my case I started with telling a story about how i didn't get
  
• Audience- I learned that when writing I should keep in mind who will be reading this. Take in to mind that the reader might or might not know what an internship is.
• Too much copy editing- There's no such thing.
• Keep it simple- Keep it simple with your words, big words confuse people sometimes. Most likely those big words can be replaced with smaller simpler words.